The Cabin in the Woods (2012) - Spicing Up the Recipe

On the Menu: THE CABIN IN THE WOODS (2012)

Ingredients: Chris Hemsworth, Kristen Connolly, Anna Hutchison, Fran Kranz, Jesse Williams, Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Amy Acker, Jodelle Ferland and Sigourney Weaver. Directed by Drew Goddard. Run time: 95 minutes. Rated: R.

At First Bite: I thought this was supposed to be out on DVD months ago, but it was released just a few weeks ago. I made sure to grab it when it did.

Curt (Hemsworth) and his friends take a little vacation to the woods. Apparently, his cousin owns a cabin there.

Meanwhile, two technicians (Jenkins and Whitford) in a control room appear to be keeping tabs on the college kids' every move.

Something weird is going on, for sure.

Tough to Swallow: There are a few continuity issues, e.g., a disappearing football here and a disappearing towel there.

I don't quite understand the point of the elaborate "games." Are we to believe the "Ones" are actually watching?

Opening the film with the twist isn't as effective as having the twist more than halfway through.

Something to Chew On: The film had an estimated budget of $30 million. Its worldwide box office totaled just under $66 million.

This is Goddard's directorial debut.

Goddard co-wrote the film with Joss Whedon. Whedon is also one of the film's producers. Goddard was also a writer for Whedon's "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel."

There are several horror movie references and homages, including THE EVIL DEAD, HELLRAISER, CUBE, THE SHINING and STEPHEN KING'S IT. A Reaver from Whedon's "Firefly" also makes an appearance.

The theatrical release date of February 5, 2010 was postponed because MGM wanted the film converted to 3D. The 3D release date was to be January 14, 2011, but MGM announced on June 14, 2010 it would be delayed indefinitely due to the studio's financial troubles. MGM filed for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy five months later. The release date ended up being April 13, 2012.

A tie-in with the PC/Xbox 360 game Left 4 Dead was canceled due to MGM's financial woes, but three of the characters from the game appear in the movie.

Aftertaste: It's difficult to really talk about the movie without spoiling it. Basically, THE CABIN IN THE WOODS is a deconstruction of the horror genre (think BEHIND THE MASK: THE RISE OF LESLIE VERNON or SCREAM or, more recently, TUCKER & DALE VS. EVIL). Why do friends always split up rather than stick together? Why does the virgin always survive? The movie answers these questions and more.

Personally, I prefer watching the technicians' side of things. Jenkins and Whitford provide the most interesting characters, by far.

Is the film too clever for its own good? Perhaps. It's not perfect. There are a few WTF moments that might leave you shaking your head. And, it's funnier than it is scary, which doesn't bode well for a horror flick. But, hey, it's the guy's first shot at directing. He did a respectable job.

What I can say is THE CABIN IN THE WOODS is different. It's nice to get away from torture porn and the never-ending list of horror remakes we see each year.

I think it definitely takes the genre and provides a much-needed kick.

Rating:

Scream 4 (2011) - Late-night Popcorn Premiere

On the Menu: SCREAM 4 (2011)

Ingredients: Neve Campbell, David Arquette, Courteney Cox, Emma Roberts, Hayden Panettiere, Rory Culkin, Anthony Anderson, Adam Brody, Kristen Bell, Anna Paquin, Eric Knudsen, Nico Tortorella, Mary McDonnell, Nancy O'Dell and Heather Graham. Directed by Wes Craven. Run time: 111 minutes. Rated: R. 

At First Bite: Despite being slightly annoyed that my Ultimate Scream Collection DVD trilogy set was made redundant, I was still super-psyched to see the fourth installment. 

Sidney (Campbell), now a writer, is back in Woodsboro on a book tour. Her arrival coincides with the 10-year anniversary of the brutal murders from the original SCREAM. You know what that means. Let the killings begin. 

Sid's younger cousin, Jill (Roberts), and her friends are the new targets. Dewey (Arquette) is now the sheriff, and is trying to keep everyone safe, while Gail (Cox) is just looking for a story to write.

But, it's not your average horror reboot (sequel, whatever).

New decade. New rules. 

Tough to Swallow: The credit for Extras casting is listed as "Extra's casting." Apparently, it took two people to hire ONE extra.

Slightly less noticeable was the extra space in the 1st Assistant Director credit under the Additional Photography section (between 1st and Assistant).

Some of the shots looked blurry, and I did hear another theatergoer mention this upon leaving the movie, so my eyes are still good.

The douchebag randomly shining a red laser pointer at the screen for the first 10 minutes of the movie, and the guys in the row behind me intermittently making jokes and talking to the screen.

One reviewer somehow confuses Lucy Hale and Emma Roberts; writing the review as if Hale's Sherrie was Sidney's cousin. Another reviewer refers to Jill as Sidney's niece. Both reviewers pretty much railed on the movie, but obviously weren't paying too much attention to it.

Something to Chew On: Anthony Anderson's character is Deputy Anthony Perkins. Anthony Perkins is, of course, the star of PSYCHO and its three sequels.

Anderson previously appeared in the last two SCARY MOVIE sequels (numbers 3 and 4).

Brittany Robertson plays Marnie Cooper. MARNIE is another classic Hitchcock thriller.

I will assume, since this movie is set in Woodsboro, the character of Dr. Orth is the father of Steve Orth, who was Casey Becker's boyfriend and the 1st victim in the original film.

Aftertaste: This succeeds where the original did. It's self-referential and pokes fun at itself, but is still scary and gory. It's a sequel/reboot (more reboot) that trashes the idea of sequels and reboots. It's also a social commentary on today's youth being controlled by texting, Twitter, iPhones, etc., and becoming famous/successful for no apparent reason. It even takes aim at the post-SCREAM 3 horror trends of torture porn and scary Japanese kids. All of those little jabs made me laugh on the inside (and sometimes out loud).

The opening scene is very clever. It screams black comedy, and, I think, that hint is what you need to remember to really enjoy this movie. Otherwise, you're just going to say, "It's just the same movie. Why didn't they leave well enough alone?"

Honestly, I've said that about almost every other horror remake, although I found things I liked about Rob Zombie's HALLOWEEN and the reboot of A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET. Ultimately, I'd rather see the original films get another theater run instead of a newer version, even if the movie looks dated like ROSEMARY'S BABY or THE BROOD.

I digress.

There's a plethora of movie references in SCREAM 4, whether they be spoken or visual. There are also nods to other films using character names (as mentioned in Something to Chew On). I love that kind of stuff. I'm so much of a nerd that I pointed out the appearance of a Mountain Dew bottle to my fiancée, Megan. Product placement is interesting to me,too. Hey, I said I'm a nerd, right?

I have to say this is the bloodiest of the franchise. The stabbings are pretty hardcore and extra bloody. Megan doesn't like horror movies, but braved this one (at midnight, no less). Her lone critique: too bloody.

The original trio of actors, as well as Roger Jackson, hold their own, but Roberts steals the movie. I mean, she is basically the new Sid. Rory Culkin should be propelled into bigger things now; he was great in MEAN CREEK and THE CHUMSCRUBBER, but the box office success of this mainstream flick should get his name out there. Look out, Kieran. And, I enjoy seeing Panettiere do anything really (even with the cropped hairdo).

I will say I successfully predicted half of the outcome about halfway through, but wasn't disappointed in being correct.

SCREAM 4, or SCRE4M as it is affectionately known, is better than its two predecessors (both of which I rated 3.5 stars). It's funny, SCREAM 2 wasn't SC2EAM, but SCREAM 3 did show up occasionally as SCR3AM. Despite there now being 7 "STAB" movies, I doubt there will be a fifth SCREAM installment. If it happens though, following the leetspeak example, I can't see them advertising it as 5CREAM.

But, who knows.

There's a strong possibility I'll see it again before it hits the cheap theaters.

Rating:

Salt (2010) - Movie Marathon Short & Sweet Review: Film #15

On the Menu: SALT (2010)

Ingredients: Angelina Jolie, Liev Schreiber, Chiwetel Ejoifor, Daniel Olbrychski and Andre Braugher. Directed by Phillip Noyce. Run time: 100 minutes (theatrical edition). Rated: PG-13. 

At First Bite: The idea of Jolie as a CIA agent who could also be a Russian spy seemed watchable enough.

Tough to Swallow: Andre Braugher has ONE line in the whole movie, but his billing is pretty high in the credits. His talents are totally wasted here. Maybe his character has more to do in the extended deluxe edition DVD.

When Peabody is reading Salt's records on his phone, there is a misspelling in the recommendations category -- "Recieved the Intelligence Commendation Medal..."

Something to Chew On: Originally scripted with a male lead, the film almost starred Tom Cruise. He backed out, and the script was rewritten with a female lead.

Aftertaste: SALT was definitely better than I had expected it to be. I mean, the action and plot are ridiculous, but it's fun to watch. And, I wasn't expecting the twist, which is always nice.

Rating:

The Time Traveler's Wife (2009) - Movie Marathon Drive-Thru Review: Film #7

On the Menu: THE TIME TRAVELER'S WIFE (2009)
Ingredients: Eric Bana, Rachel McAdams, Ron Livingston, Arliss Howard and Stephen Tobolowsky. Directed by Robert Schwentke. Run time: 107 minutes. Rated: PG-13.

At First Bite: I'm a sucker for time travel and Rachel McAdams. Sue me.

Tough to Swallow: Henry has no control over when he travels yet tells Clare (in their first meeting) he'll be back Tuesday at 4 o'clock. Later, we're shown the scene of him sneaking a peek at Clare's diary where he explains he's trying to memorize the dates. Seems backwards to me.

In Clare's diary, the calendar for February 1984 shows 30 days.

On the train, Henry's mom is reading the Chicago Tribune, but page 3 is The Washington Post.

In the scene following the breaking plate, Henry runs across the street. There's a Canadian flag flying in front of the building. The movie is supposed to be set in Chicago.

During an argument in Clare's workshop, whatever she is working on continuously flips over between shots.

Time travel in this story is slightly different than we're used to: Henry can't change past events. Okay, but how is cheating at contests because of knowing the future results exempt from this rule? Or with past-Henry's sexcapade the night after the big argument? Sure, that's changing the present/future, but it's still meddling.

It's odd that more Henrys don't show up in the meadow at one time. I mean, Henry explains that his traveling destinations are caused by a "gravity" -- he's drawn to important places/events. So, wouldn't it be plausible and highly likely to see a big Henry party? Sometimes we see two at a time, but most often the case is one Henry leaves and is replaced by a future- or past-Henry (as if there can be only one Henry per instance).

Also, given what we know she knows, I wonder what Alba thinks of her maternal grandfather.

Something to Chew On: Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston bought the rights to the novel before it was published.

Author Audrey Niffenegger wanted Adrien Brody for the lead. Eva Green wanted the role of Clare.

Pretty sure you get a nice glimpse of McAdams's backside. I thought maybe it was a body double, but couldn't see a break in continuity from when she gets out of bed.

A clip from the 1939 movie DARK VICTORY (featuring Bette Davis and Ronald Reagan) is playing on TV when Henry comes back from telling little Clare he's married.

There's a nice bit of foreshadowing in the scene where Henry meets Clare's dad. Note: Check out the mirror in every shot, and her dad's next-to-last line of dialogue.

One of the dates in Clare's diary is May 14, 1986 (my sixth birthday).

Aftertaste: Maybe, in order to really appreciate this movie, you have to forget everything you know about how time travel works in other films, books, etc. Yes, it was really hard for me to do. I imagine it would be like forgetting about all you know about vampire and werewolf lore in order to appreciate the TWILIGHT movies.

It's a love story, first and foremost. Time travel is just an obstacle to overcome.

Seriously, your brain will explode trying to make sense of the ending.

From what I've read about the novel's ending, it's very Nicholas Sparks-y, but I like it more than the movie's.

Rating:

Inception (2010) - It Will Hurt Your Brain

On the Menu: INCEPTION (2010)

Ingredients: Leonardo DiCaprio, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Ellen Page, Tom Hardy, Ken Watanabe, Cillian Murphy, Marion Cotillard, Michael Caine, Tom Berenger, Lukas Haas, Dileep Rao and Pete Postlethwaite. Directed by Christopher Nolan. Run time: 148 minutes. Rated: PG-13.

At First Bite: All I needed to be psyched for this film was the preview and the cast/crew list. I'm a huge Joseph Gordon-Levitt fan, and, as I noted in my WHIP IT review, I heart Ellen Page. Also, I've seen all of Christopher Nolan's films and never rated one lower than 4 stars (FOLLOWING, MEMENTO and THE DARK KNIGHT were all 5s, in my opinion).

Dom Cobb (DiCaprio) is an expert in extraction. He goes into someone's dream and steals something the dreamer is trying to keep secret/hidden. So, basically, he's a thief.

He's also a fugitive. If he can complete his final assignment, then his name will be cleared and he can go back to his family. The catch is it's not an extraction. It's inception.

His employer, Saito (Watanabe), wants him to implant an idea into a business rival's subconscious.

Cobb's partner, Arthur (Gordon-Levitt), doesn't think it can work. He believes a dreamer will always know if an idea is innately his/hers.

So, is inception possible? Cobb thinks so. They'll just have to go even deeper into the subconscious than they have before.

Cobb assembles a crack team (in addition to Arthur): an architect named Ariadne (Page), a forger (Hardy) and a chemist (Rao).

Problem is recent assignments have been sabotaged by someone who somehow knows the layouts of the dream worlds.

Will they succeed?

Tough to Swallow: I figured out the significance of the opening scene rather early, i.e., the players and location.

It's all still confusing, but the way I understood the concept of kicks (things set off to upset the dreamer's equilibrium, which causes him/her to awaken) and levels, Arthur, in Level Two, should have woken up when the van initially drove off the bridge in Level One. Right?

Two of the people sitting in my row (both two seats away from me) constantly had their phones out texting someone. Come on. Do we need to walk through a phone detector before going into a movie theater? Obviously, some people do.

Second Helping: Watched the movie again (July 20).

I took extensive notes.

**SPOILER ALERT** I don't think the entire movie is a dream. There are moments when Cobb spins his totem and it stops spinning, which means he's not in a dream. One such moment is right before he speaks to his kids on the phone.

If there's an interpretation I really like, it's that the film is a retelling of the Minotaur story in Greek mythology, where Ariadne helps Theseus find his way out of the maze after defeating the beast. Others have suggested Ariadne is Cobb's therapist, which would go along with the myth in a way. She sets up these elaborate mazes for Cobb to work his way through while fighting his beast, the guilt from Mal's death.

I have two questions that might be important to understanding the movie.
1) Was the top Mal's totem before Cobb started using it?
2) Did Saito and Cobb awaken from limbo because the sedation wore off or because Saito used the gun?

Something to Chew On: This is Nolan's first original work since FOLLOWING (1998).

INCEPTION is a film about sleeping. Nolan's 2002 film INSOMNIA is a film about staying awake.

Nolan initially pitched INCEPTION to Warner Bros. after completing INSOMNIA. The script wasn't written at the time. He had apparently started writing it while shooting MEMENTO (2000), but it ended up taking almost 10 years to finish.

One of the main characters in FOLLOWING is named Cobb, which is also the last name of DiCaprio's character. Both characters are types of burglars.

James Franco was offered the role of Arthur, but had to turn it down due to scheduling conflicts.

Evan Rachel Wood turned down the role of Ariadne. Emily Blunt, Rachel McAdams and Emma Roberts were also considered for the part.

Michael Gaston, who plays Sanford Harris on "Fringe," has a small part as an immigration officer.

Edith Piaf's "Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien" (translated No, I Regret Nothing) is one of the songs in the movie (used as kick music). Cotillard played Piaf in LA VIE EN ROSE, and won an Oscar for her performance.

Some extraction team members carry totems, which are small, private objects the individual uses to help him/her differentiate between reality and the dream world. Ariadne's object is a chess piece (pawn?). Murphy's character is named Robert Fischer, Jr. Former World Chess Champion Bobby Fischer's birth name was Robert Fischer.

In Greek mythology, Ariadne was the one who helped Theseus successfully navigate out of the Minotaur's labyrinth. The first thing Cobb asks Ariadne to do is quickly draw a maze that it would take him a minute to solve. The maze she stumps him on is circular, as is the Minotaur's. Later, she ends up creating even more elaborate mazes within dreams.

In the Quran, the story of Yusuf (also Yusef) begins with a dream and ends with its interpretation.

Cotillard's character is named Mal, which means evil (in French and Latin).

The film currently has a 9.3 user rating on IMDb.com (5,123 votes).

Aftertaste: The movie is all about ideas.

Speaking of ideas, kudos to Nolan for hashing out an original one. I'm tired of all these remakes (although I enjoyed A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and look forward to DINNER FOR SCHMUCKS).

I don't necessarily understand everything that I saw on screen. Sure, you're taught the principles of extraction and the architecture of dreams along with Ariadne, but that doesn't mean it all makes sense. Some dream concepts will ring true with you though (at least, for me, they did): 1) if you die in a dream, you just wake up and 2) the sense of falling will pull you out of your slumber.

It's on the same level as THE MATRIX and DONNIE DARKO as far as mind-blowing plot goes.

But, as all-consuming as the plot is, to me, it's just a fragment of what makes this film so impressive. The visuals are simply amazing. Seriously, I am more impressed with the look of the dream worlds in this film than I was by anything in AVATAR. There's a never-ending staircase, a cityscape that folds over onto itself, zero-gravity fighting sequences and things exploding everywhere. And that's just a taste, really.

Hans Zimmer's score is sometimes haunting and sometimes beautiful, but it always works.

The acting is top-notch. Sure, the movie spends more time developing DiCaprio's character, but he's the lead. Gordon-Levitt and Page are two of my personal favorites, and they did not disappoint. Hardy is going to be the next break-out actor, in my opinion (see BRONSON). Next to DiCaprio, Cotillard gives the best performance in the movie though. I was pleasantly surprised to see Berenger, who held his own amongst all the young stars.

I plan on seeing this again within the next days, so I'll definitely be adding a Second Helping section.

I've always wondered what it would be like if you could share dreams. After watching INCEPTION, I'm not sure I'd like that.

Just thinking about it gives me a headache.

Rating:

Anatomy of a Murder (1959) - Honorable Classic

On the Menu: ANATOMY OF A MURDER (1959)

Ingredients: James Stewart, Ben Gazzara, Lee Remick, George C. Scott, Eve Arden, Arthur O'Connell and Kathryn Grant. Directed by Otto Preminger. Run time: 160 minutes. Rated: Unrated.

At First Bite: I had always thought this was directed by Alfred Hitchcock, and I still thought it was as I was watching the opening credits. Then, of course, I saw Preminger's name instead. Within the last year, I have seen two of his other films: CARMEN JONES (1954) and BUNNY LAKE IS MISSING (1965). I enjoyed the latter far more than the former, but figured this one would be good just because of Stewart and Scott.

Paul Biegler (Stewart) is a small town lawyer, who spends most of his time fishing. His alcoholic, elder lawyer buddy, Parnell McCarthy (O'Connell), tells him about a case that has come to town. Lieutenant Frederick Manion (Gazzara) is in jail for murdering a bartender who allegedly raped his wife the same night.

Biegler decides to go with "irresistible impulse" as the defense. Unfortunately, he's stuck with a judge he doesn't know and the assistant district attorney is helping the prosecution. It also doesn't help that Mrs. Manion (Remick) is a seductress, and her husband is prone to fits of jealous rage.

The case really seems cut and dry, but the prosecution has seriously underestimated the country lawyer.

Tough to Swallow: When Parnell comes over to Paul's house in the beginning of the film, there are two shots where it's as though the cameraman bumps into the wall or doorframe while walking backwards. They're both pretty noticeable. I know Preminger uses long shots, but I would think you would cut and shoot it again.

Maybe it's just 1959, but the prospect of witness coaching doesn't seem to be that big of a deal, and I didn't understand how the prosecution could possibly keep the motive (rape) from being part of the murder case initially.

Something to Chew On: Michigan Supreme Court Justice John Voelker wrote the novel, which is based on a 1952 slaying just north of Marquette, Michigan. Voelker used the pseudonym Robert Traver.

The film was shot in two months, and just a month later it was already cut, scored and in previews.

During its original release it was banned from Chicago. It stirred controversy by including the words "bitch," "contraceptive," "panties," "penetration," "rape," "slut" and "sperm." James Stewart's father took an ad out in his local paper telling people not to see it. The film was one of the first Hollywood movies to challenge the Hays Code (censorship guidelines); the others were SOME LIKE IT HOT and PSYCHO.

Spencer Tracy and Burl Ives were offered the role of the judge, but it went to former U.S. Army lawyer Joseph Welch. Lana Turner was offered the part of Mrs. Manion, but Preminger turned her down because she wanted to only wear gowns by Jean Louis. With Turner in talks to play Mrs. Manion, Preminger had asked Remick to play Mary Pilant. Remick refused, but was later given the bigger role once Turner was out of the picture.

The entire soundtrack was composed by Duke Ellington and Billy Strayhorn and performed by Ellington's orchestra. Ellington took home a Grammy for his efforts. He also has a cameo in the film as Pie-Eye.

The film was nominated for 7 Academy Awards: Best Actor, Best Supporting Actor (Scott and O'Connell), Best Cinematography (B&W), Best Film Editing, Best Picture and Best Writing (Screenplay Based on Material from Another Medium). However, the film did not win any Oscars.

The American Film Institute voted Preminger's film to be the 7th best courtroom drama of all-time (June 2008).

The film currently has an 8.2 user rating on IMDb.com (15,502 votes).

Sides: The DVD only includes a photo montage, some talent files and vintage advertising.

Aftertaste: I love courtroom dramas about as much as I enjoy prison movies. And, to have Stewart and Scott playing off of each other made this one brilliant. It's kind of the same situation you see in A TIME TO KILL; the country lawyer, with help from his colleagues (at least one drunk in each movie), goes up against a big-time prosecutor.

I still question why and how the issue of rape could have been ignored in the case. It was the motive. The defense actually had to put up a fight to get anything involving Mrs. Manion included. To me, it was a little strange. Neither side had a problem with witness coaching, which goes to show Biegler and Dancer (Scott) have their own problems with what is right or wrong.

The movie is 2 hours and 40 minutes long, but it doesn't feel that long. And, I think that has a lot to do with the verbal sparring between the lawyers. They're intense. They make it fun, and you're interested to see how they're going to one-up each other with every witness.

As much as I've talked about Stewart and Scott, the supporting cast is just as great. O'Connell and Arden, who plays Biegler's secretary, are wonderful complements to Stewart. Remick is a cutie, and plays the flirtatious wife to perfection. I spent most of the movie trying to figure out where I had seen Ben Gazzara before. I finally realized he was the crime boss in ROAD HOUSE. I do think though Remick and Gazzara, whether through acting or looks, make it harder to believe in the innocence of their characters.

The verdict is in: ANATOMY OF A MURDER is guilty of greatness.

Rating:

Whiteout (2009) - Too Bland for My Tastes

On the Menu: WHITEOUT (2009); Blockbuster Rental DVD

Ingredients: Kate Beckinsale, Tom Skerritt, Gabriel Macht, Columbus Short and Alex O'Loughlin. Directed by Dominic Sena. Run time: 96 minutes. Rated: R.

At First Bite: The trailer was promising. It sets up a mystery/thriller involving a buried plane in Antarctica. And, they even show part of a Beckinsale shower scene in the trailer. All right. Got my attention.

The movie begins by showing us the fateful 1957 flight of the plane in the trailer. Then, we're introduced to our chilly setting via a caption that reads:

ANTARCTICA
THE COLDEST,
MOST ISOLATED LAND MASS
ON THE PLANET

I assume we should just hazard a guess that it's present day. The next set of captions let us know the name of the base, the latitude and longitude and the temperature -- a balmy (-55) degrees Celsius, which converts to (-67) degrees Fahrenheit. But, oddly, that doesn't stop guys from hopping off planes nude and streaking across the base. There's a minute-long tracking shot following our heroine, U.S. Marshal Carrie Stetko, from a short trek outside to her shower (that might be the best camerawork in the movie).

The vast majority of the base is evacuating for the winter, including Carrie. She's planning on resigning from her post with dreams of becoming a professional backgammon player back in the States. But, hold the phone, a body has been found. It's Antarctica's first murder, which means Carrie has to stay put and investigate.

A couple more bodies turn up and a mysterious cargo is missing from the buried plane. How is it all connected? 

Tough to Swallow: The dialogue leaves much to be desired. It's actually funny sometimes because most of the time the characters are just stating the obvious as though the filmmakers thought the audience would be either stupid or wouldn't see what was on the screen. "It's a body. It looks like he's been shot through the head." Really? Wouldn't have guessed from the bullet wound or since we saw him die in the opening sequence of the movie. I mean, why even start the movie off with the 1957 flight if you're going to recreate the entire crash later when the plane is found?

The movie is full of flashbacks. Five of them are of the same scene, which proves to be the exposition for Carrie and her trust issues. Then, of course, are the pointless mini-flashes of the '57 crash as well as its recent discovery.

The movie's twist is foreshadowed by, to be honest, a mere glance, plus the Law of Economy of Characters (see Ebert's definition).

Doc (Skerritt) informs us early on that a whiteout is a ridiculously dangerous weather condition where you can't see 6 inches in front of your face. Yet, the final chase/fight scene takes place during the whiteout and somehow they can see each other just fine (even when they're all wearing giant parkas and goggles). Plus, as long as someone is attached to a safety line the wind doesn't really affect them. And, can three people really survive 7 minutes of (-70+) degrees without wearing some type of mask? You'd think frostbite would set in pretty quick under those circumstances.

Oh, and Carrie is a U.S. Marshal and carries a gun, but I don't think she ever used it once. That's kinda weird when there's a killer chasing her around the base for most of the movie.

Dark Castle Entertainment put its name on this, but its filmography consists mostly of horror films (HOUSE ON HAUNTED HILL, GHOST SHIP, ORPHAN, etc.). WHITEOUT is no horror film.

How's about the nitpicky stuff, huh? Well, a thesis paper has the word doctoral misspelled as "doctorial." The label on Doc's Scotch Whisky bottle reads Scotch Whiskey. And, when Carrie and her crew go looking for grid 104 (where the plane is buried), the GPS coordinates, if researched with Google Earth (or what have you), show them to be on Lake Manitoba in Canada.

Something to Chew On: Reese Witherspoon was attached to the movie way back in 2002.

The film currently has a 5.3 user rating on IMDb.com (6,511 votes).

Sides: This Blockbuster Rental DVD has zero features. The only two options on the menu are "Play Movie" and "Languages."

Aftertaste: WHITEOUT was pretty disappointing. It's too predictable and the payoff was really lame considering the Cold War implications in the movie's opening sequence. I know the dialogue is bad (they should have used Wite-Out on most of the script), but I'm beginning to question whether Gabriel Macht should look for a new profession. Kate Beckinsale, on the other hand, is worth watching in almost anything. And, guys, you'll at least be happy with the opening sequence at the base. It's really the best part of the movie. After that comes the gratuitous flashbacks and surprising lack of frostbite. I think the filmmakers tried to sell it as a slasher film, but it didn't quite live up to that billing. The premise of the first homicide in Antarctica is murdered by the actual plot. The initial run-in with the killer is a little intense, but, overall, the movie is overwhelmingly blah.

Rating:

Triangle (2009) - It's All Greek to Me

On the Menu: TRIANGLE (2009)

Ingredients: Melissa George, Michael Dorman, Rachael Carpani, Henry Nixon, Emma Lung and Liam Hemsworth. Directed by Christopher Smith. Run time: 98 minutes. Rated: R.

At First Bite: I first heard of Christopher Smith four years ago when IMDb.com was holding a poster contest. One of his entries was what turned out to be the poster for his 2004 film CREEP; it didn't win, but it should have been disqualified for violating the rule of not being previously published. That didn't stop me from watching CREEP though. It was okay, but it was his horror/comedy SEVERANCE that I really enjoyed. Smith's previous films aside, it was the film's title that got me interested. I will gladly watch any movie dealing with the Bermuda Triangle, the Loch Ness Monster or Sherlock Holmes. It's more of a Bermuda Triangle-Haunted Ship-Time Travel-Twilight Zone movie.

Melissa George (30 DAYS OF NIGHT, "Grey's Anatomy") plays Jess, the frazzled mother of an autistic son. She's invited by her friend Greg (Dorman) to go sailing. Four others are onboard for the ride, and, unlike Jess, seemingly excited to be there. All's fine and well until the wind ceases and a storm approaches. The sailboat overturns, but a luxury ocean liner appears out of nowhere just when things are looking bleak. Once aboard, they determine the ship deserted, but Jess is having a really weird feeling of déjà vu. But, the worst is yet to come. A hooded figure emerges and is hellbent on killing everyone.

The story seems straightforward, but once it gets going you realize just how fractured the narrative is.

Tough to Swallow: There are a couple of CGI elements that are pretty bad (namely the sea gull and seeing the sailboat from the ocean liner's deck). The DVD cover art ruined the film's initial twist for me. The most disappointing aspect is the DVD is lacking in special features. A commentary track or making-of featurette would have done wonders to help those who don't truly understand the point of the film.

Something to Chew On: I was paying super-close attention to the opening shots, and there are tiny details, e.g. a child's toy, fridge magnets, a three-digit number and a street sign, that either foreshadow events to come or tie in with something later in the film. The three-digit number, I think, might be a reference to Kubrick's THE SHINING (although the movie might draw more comparisons to TIMECRIMES). Plus, if you're up on your Greek mythology, the name of the ocean liner, S.S. Aeolus, brings its own connotations. Aeolus was the ruler of the winds, and the wind oddly stops moments before the ship enters the picture. A story related to Aeolus is discussed briefly in the film, and, to me, it's the key to comprehending the plot (and it's VERY apparent that most of the reviewers/critics of TRIANGLE failed to catch it).

The film currently has a 6.7 user rating on IMDb.com (3,410 votes).

Sides: The DVD includes about six minutes of cast and crew interviews. The discussions range from George's performance to shooting locations. I was interested to see that they constructed half of an ocean liner at the end of a peninsula, but they don't really focus on it for long. The trailer is also included on the disc.

Aftertaste: TRIANGLE isn't a conventional genre film. Reading the DVD case at the rental store will make you think it's a slasher flick or Bermuda Triangle mystery. Well, it's both, but it's so much more. The film is determined not to be a whodunit, but more of a why-is-it-happening story. I love movies that mess with your mind, and this is one you'll definitely want to discuss with someone afterward.

Comparisons to TIMECRIMES (I strongly recommend seeing it, by the way) might be warranted given there's a hooded crazy and a time travel element, but the infusion of the Greek myth and the haunting performance of George makes TRIANGLE stand out on its own. I love the tiny details Smith left early on, and, despite the crappy sea gull, there is one wowing effect that I will NOT spoil here (loose lips sink ships, right?). However, the effect is quite eerie and pretty freakin' awesome. I look forward to Smith's next feature, BLACK DEATH, which should be out this year. TRIANGLE took a plot device and gave it a backstory by simply alluding to a myth. It may or may not float your boat. It did mine.


On a side note, feta cheese is good, garbanzo beans are okay, but Greek yogurt is blah.

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